Hello everyone. Bla bla bla yes I haven’t written for a while, miss you, etc.
You know it is not me who is inconsiderate or rude: am rapid cycling.
Say what? Say one day am high as a kite (a small kite since am bipolar 2), and the next am digging a tunnel to the the after life (does that even make any sense?)
You get the picture. Am a yo-yo, I am a roller coaster, a bullet train with bad breaks.
I enjoy my ups and do accomplish a lot; especially if you count shopping as an accomplishment. I spend hours without eating (big high five since I tend to feed like a newborn every 2 hours). I even live on 5 hours of sleep and I am Eeyore on any other day.
Woke up at 6 am today (weekend here on my side of the world) and hoped into my trainers and on to the kettle and to my smokes.
Am sociable, am pretty, am smart and talkative. I love it.
I wrote this down to me Nour. Yes to me, for in a few hours I will feel like dirt is better than me. I will feel empty and useless and I will become a burden. I will get back to staring at the ceiling and doing nothing but dealing with suicidal ideation.
Today however I will kiss my kids, a lot and lots more. I will go for a long walk like the book says. I will have lunch with my beautiful loving family and I will dress to impress. I will put on my make up and my new earrings. I will take a selfie or two and hashtag them to mentalhealthawareness.
Meanwhile my rapid cycling friend; I freakin feel you. You are my hero.
Remember, for every down there is an up coming and heck yes we shall ride the wave and rise to the moon.