When good things are stressful

Inside this bubble of depression, inside this cloud of anxiety, with all decisions even the smallest ones seeming like an insurmountable mountain, I cannot deal with good or bad news…

When going on a trip to a beautiful place fills me with dread as if I am to jump off a cliff, I wonder how I will ever get back to myself…

Life is the sum of all the details. When the details are dreadful what do you do with your life?

I don’t want to end anything but my depression. I want to look forward to things, I want to stop fearing social situations. I want to stop wearing my facial mask when I meet people trying hard to say I am normal – whatever that means…

All I want is to be left alone. I don’t want any responsibility. I don’t want any tasks. I often even don’t want to talk when I am talked to…

Everything shall pass. Those are symptoms. Put them in a box says my beautiful therapist. I will try dear, though I cannot find the difference between my symptoms and everything else…

TBC

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