When you have to explain to your child your mental illness…

People with depression have this good tendency to put up a facial mask in social situations. Maybe this is not valid in all situations, but in some it is crucial.

I hadn’t told my eldest daughter who is almost 9 anything about my depression. I brought it up during my last session with my therapist. I told her how my daughter is so smart, how she sees me take medications – totally unusual for me… She never uttered a word. Though she asks me a thousand questions a day about everything and nothing.

She never brought up the medication. I used to try and do this in private, but day in day out, it became obvious that mama has to take her meds

Update: A few weeks have passed since this post was written. None of my above fears can even explain how much the situation has become complicated. Me who shelters her children even from TV, I made them see me taken by ambulance while screaming my guts out to be left alone. I told my daughter to go inside. Poor baby she did. I can never forgive myself this… never…

TBC

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